Welcome Home

Moonlight seeps through windows, shadows cling to walls, a draft sweeps over my face, cold fingers, tired eyes, alone.

Each room vacant except the one I’m in. Each floor board intricately placed in a pattern I am so familiar with, a path worn into the wood from where I’ve walked countless sleepless nights praying for Your provision. The closet in the backroom sacred and holy. 

You are welcome to come inside. It’s not much. It’s a humble dwelling place but it’s all I have and it’s all Yours if You’d have it. I’ve tried to clean up this mess before inviting You in but nothing I could ever do is worthy for even Your feet to touch. You gently knock, ever so kindly. I open the door and You greet me with an embrace that rises souls from the dead. You walk in, I apologize for the mess, You smile. Sweet love of mine, I love a mess, that’s where my best love stories are born. I stare into Your eyes falling deeper in love with every breath You take. I show You around room by room, You walk with me. You listen to me go on and on about the changes I want to make, about the dreams for this place of mine. We get to the closet. My tiny red walled closet. This. This is the place I love the most, the place you let me fill. The place you have communion with me. The place that you die and I live. Then I realize it’s not mine at all, it’s Yours. It’s all Yours. Not just the closet but the whole house. This place I’ve invited you into, the place You’ve longed to come in, with it’s cracked door facings, busted windows, and empty rooms, You look me straight in the soul. Can I stay? Can I take these rooms of your heart and dwell here? Can I repair the holes, can I heal the dead, can I fill the rooms with my Spirit, can I call your heart My home? Unworthy and astounded that You, Holiest of Holies, would ask to stay with me. To renovate my run down heart. To bring forth life in the barren land, to flip the tables, to breathe breath into my lungs, to teach my heart to beat to the song of heaven. 

I fall on my knees and press my face into Your garment. I wash Your feet with my weeping. I hold Your hands and feel healing. You have been making changes to this heart of mine before I even knew Your name. I’d notice a flower in the bed outside and wonder who planted it there, little did I know they were Your love letters to me. You were faithful in writing them. You never missed a chance to tell me how much You love me. What have I done to deserve love like this? Out of all the houses You picked mine. Out of all the ones who’s gardens were already in full bloom and whose rooms were already furnished why mine? Because you left room for Me. You have allowed Me to plant life in your garden, you left rooms completely vacant for Me to fill, you came humbly to Me with nothing but everything you have. My precious love the rooms in your heart are not filled with things of this world but of Me, of My presence, and that is why I came, because You left room for Me. 

Weeping, snotting, messy I come to You praying I never stop adding rooms to my heart and filling them with You, with love for Your children. You have full residency, full control, full dominion over not only my heart, but my life. Father stay with me, stay with me for all eternity. Dwell in the chambers of my heart, pour out Your Spirit, my cup runneth over. You are mine and I am yours. We both whisper welcome home.